Trauma does 2 things:
- The mind leaves the present moment. (dissociation) This is for protection. It is an attempt to find safety. This is like worrying in worst-case scenarios with obsessive thoughts. These thoughts are fear-based thoughts. We are constantly going to analyze the past and analyze the future.
- We leave the body. This is also for protection. We distance ourselves from our bodies and our emotions to cope with the trauma.
When we are disconnected from the body, the ego intervenes to develop something called body image.
Body image is an internalized belief about your body to deal with the disconnection. Body image should be consistently maintained. So, we deal with chronic comparison, evaluation, condemnation, self-betrayal, criticism, and self-shaming.
The body image was created by:
- Parent figures. How they speak about their body, your body, and appearance and the appearance of others. This becomes a body value system — or traits where we are taught what is desirable. Like sponges, we mimic the body image of the parent figures.
- Media and society. It is a mirror reflection of these value systems. Media and society projects an ideal image. Think about bullying and excluding obese children at a very young age. When we consume the products (diets, beauty products, etc.), we are actually trying to buy relief. A new emotional state with self-esteem, validation, and connection.
Consciously connecting with the body is healing.
It is relearning to feel safe in the present moment.
Ways to start conscious movement:
- Stretch for 10 minutes when you wake up.
- Take a walk and be aware of the way your body moves, how your feet hit the ground, how the wind hits your body.
- Yoga: mind, body and breath. Highly recommend “Yoga with Adrienne” on YouTube.
Every time you reconnect with your body without judging how you feel about your body is a step forward. It means that all the shame and thoughts just ARE there. With that, you make a positive statement of your existence.
Now let’s take a look at communication with the narcissist.
Step one: realize, don’t react. You’re just releasing a narcissistic supply, don’t waste your energy. You’re just going to abuse yourself.
Step two: create detachment, where your gray rock goes, or you go into the silence.
Then, so important, step three: go within to fully heal and reclaim your Soul so that the narcissist does not become your reality, NYR — you are not my reality.
What I want you to do right now is to pause here, and I want you to write this powerful intention below.
This is what this powerful intention is: “I have let you go. I end this battle now. From this day forward, I claim my Soul, true self, and true life.”
This is a beautiful mantra to say to yourself because that’s how you beat them. Saying this mantra will prevent them from hurting you.
This is how you begin to understand that narcissists do not have an energy system of their own, and they cannot survive unless they feed on your pain, your traumatized energy. That’s their food, that’s their food.
So, this is the bottom line. When you clear your pain from within and evolve yourself beyond it, a narcissist becomes as powerless as the little petite man or woman behind the curtain. And you will understand that they have only been fueled by your pain and your fear, and your reactions.
If you break free from it, from within, you will see yourself rising in your life as they shrink from your life experience.
Go within and begin to reclaim your Soul!
Now, you don’t have to believe anything I say. As I have seen from myself and so many others in this community, I know that when you go within and begin to reclaim your Soul, you will see it for yourself.
Don’t forget to like and share this article with the people and communities you would like to see healing from abuse.
When it comes time for you to truly heal, I want you to check out the English-language NARP. The healing system that healed me and thousands of others from over 120 different countries of the unthinkable and the symptoms we were told we would never cure.
I’d love to hear from you about this episode, what you’ve done to regain your power, what you now recognize you need to do, and of course, any questions you may have.