If you’re here, chances are you’re now dealing with overwhelming emotional pain. Feelings of stress, anxiety, depression, and especially big emotional triggers can be sparked by many things.
Understanding the Source of Big Emotional Triggers
Narcissistic abuse and gaslighting are especially powerful examples of big emotional triggers. A narcissist might smear your reputation. They replace you with someone else. They threaten you. They might give you the silent treatment. They abandon you entirely.
They may disappear and cut off all contact, leaving you in a state of shock. Or maybe certain memories or sights resurface, unleashing a wave of emotional pain. When this happens, it can feel like ice is running through your veins. You might feel powerless, helpless, or even experience panic attacks.
Have you ever felt like your world was crashing down from just one text or memory?
Example: You see a photo on social media of the narcissist happily vacationing with their new partner. Suddenly, you feel like you can’t breathe, and your stomach knots up. That’s a somatic trigger.
Why This Method Matters
That’s why I want to share a method with you today. This simple yet powerful approach can bring clarity and strength. It can help you feel like you’re reclaiming your soul.
But before we dive into it, I want to gently remind you: our Masterclass is just a few days away. I hope you’ll join us.
When Big Emotional Triggers Hit
Let’s talk about those moments when big emotional triggers strike. These are the times when you’re being abused, gaslit, or made to feel invisible. Your feelings, needs, and boundaries are dismissed.
Have you tried to explain your pain, only to be ignored or blamed?
You try to make things better, to seek fairness or understanding. But instead, everything spirals further out of control.
You’re cruelly replaced, smeared, or abandoned. People turn against you. Or you’re threatened with the loss of what or who you love most.
Sometimes it’s just the unbearable weight of memories.
Example: You find an old message from the narcissist, one where they promised they’d never leave. The pain that floods in makes it feel like the breakup is happening all over again.
The Truth About Emotional Overwhelm
I know how excruciating this is. Truly. It can feel like you’re at the mercy of your emotions and completely out of control.
Do you ever feel like no matter how hard you try, the pain keeps pulling you under?
But here’s the truth: there is a way to gain relief and calm, even in your darkest moments. Let me show you how.
The Common Reaction: Overthinking
Picture this: the big emotional trigger hits. What’s your instinct?
Most of us were taught to instantly start thinking about it. But thinking rarely brings relief.
Why?
Because it often turns into what I call “stinking thinking.”
Your brain follows your body. You can only think within the emotional state you’re in. Your nervous system is hijacked, and your thoughts spiral from there.
Quick takeaway:
- Thinking alone won’t resolve emotional pain
- Your nervous system must feel safe for your thoughts to shift
- Body awareness is key to calming your mind
Example: You start replaying the argument in your head, imagining what you should have said. Hours later, you’re even more upset, and nothing feels resolved.
Have you caught yourself in that loop of replaying conversations over and over?
What to Do Instead
So what should you do instead?
Don’t contract your body. Breathe deeply. Gently bring your awareness into your body—right into the place where the emotion is living.
Now say to yourself: “I bless and accept this feeling.”
Embracing the Feeling
You be wondering: Won’t that make the feeling stronger? Am I giving in to the pain?
No. Quite the opposite.
By blessing and accepting the feeling, you validate and support it with love. You’re telling that part of yourself, “I see you. I’m here.”
That’s all it ever wanted. With your presence, it can begin to calm down.
Example: You feel a heavy sadness in your chest. Instead of trying to push it away, you place a hand there. Breathe deeply and say, “I bless and accept this feeling.” Over a few minutes, the sadness starts to soften.
Have you ever tried simply sitting with your pain instead of pushing it away?
Don’t Get Stuck in the Story
This isn’t about getting lost in the story of what happened. That brings you back into mental loops. Instead, you’re staying open, breathing deeply and slowly, and allowing that part of your body to feel supported.
Can you let go of the need to analyze just for a moment, and simply be with yourself?
The Power of Self-Partnering
This is called self-partnering. Rather than disconnecting or suppressing what’s going on inside, you’re nurturing it.
The old way—overthinking—leaves your Inner Being feeling abandoned and invalidated. That’s why the big emotional triggers keep getting louder. They’re trying to pull your attention inward.
Think of your Inner Being as a frightened child who just wants to be seen and loved.
Example: Imagine a child crying in a corner. If you ignore them, they cry louder. But if you kneel beside them and say, “I’m here,” they start to calm.
What if you start treating yourself with the same compassion you’d offer a scared child?
Try It With Me
Now, let’s try it together:
Step-by-step recap:
- Think of something that’s hurting you right now.
- Gently notice where you feel it in your body (tightness, heaviness, discomfort?).
- Make sure your body is relaxed.
- Breathe deeply.
- Say to yourself: “I bless and accept this feeling.”
- Stay with this part of your body and breathe love and presence into it.
- Don’t analyze—just be present.
Notice what shifts.
Now, just sit and breathe love and presence into that space—without analyzing anything.
Can you stay attentive with this part of you just a little longer today?
The Path to Healing
This is how you begin to reunite with yourself. You can’t think your way out of emotional trauma. But when you lovingly meet your emotional pain, you open the door to powerful thoughts, clarity, and solutions.
And that’s exactly what we’ll explore together in the Masterclass.
You’re Not Alone
This is just the beginning. I’m committed to helping you move beyond cycles of abuse into a life of freedom, love, and inner strength.
What if healing is closer than you think?
Keep going. You’re doing beautifully.
Recommended Resources
To deepen your understanding of big emotional triggers and healing from narcissistic abuse, you may find these sources helpful:
- “The Body Keeps the Score” by Bessel van der Kolk – This foundational book explains how trauma affects the body. It emphasizes that healing must involve somatic awareness.
- Dr. Ramani Durvasula on YouTube – Offers accessible and expert insights into narcissistic abuse and recovery strategies.
- Pete Walker – Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving – A practical guide. It helps in understanding emotional flashbacks. It also aids in healing the inner child.
- NICABM (National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Medicine) – Research-based resources on trauma healing and nervous system regulation.
These resources can provide further validation, education, and support as you navigate the journey of emotional healing.
- NICABM (National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Medicine) – Research-based resources on trauma healing and nervous system regulation.
These resources can provide further validation, education, and support as you navigate the journey of emotional healing.
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