Sometimes life has to be valued: at work, on a date, an interview, a conversation whose theme we do not control …
Some would even say that it is inherent in the Mediterranean Picaron character.
Where is the line between good self-esteem and sinning as a narcissist? Is it really a problem with our current society?
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The thin line between self-respect and narcissism.
In short, narcissism is maximal self-esteem; the excessive admiration that you feel for your physical appearance, qualities or gifts.
Self-centredness, related to the above although not precisely the same, is the paranoia of the narcissist;
The admiration that you feel for yourself is such that you think that you are the centre of attention and concern of other people.
These two psychological phenomena seem to describe what happens to many people. Still, for those unfamiliar with the subject, it is good to emphasize the differences between narcissism and self-esteem.
The denial of the value of others.
The difference between narcissism and self-esteem is that the first implies the denial of the value of others, which are reduced to mere providers of attention and fame.
On the other hand, our self-confidence makes us feel good about ourselves as beings integrated into a society full of perfectly able people.
But … does the passage of time not change our self-esteem into narcissism by using new technologies?
The evolution of narcissism.
Adolescence is a phase of the revolution, among other things hormonal, that leads us to ups and downs of self-worth.
Hopefully, after this time, we managed to leave it unharmed and with a regular sense of self-worth.
This series of perceptions, thoughts and judgments of ourselves will undoubtedly influence how we see the world around us.
According to some theories, we build our self-confidence based on the social acceptance of our colleagues.
But there comes a time when someone’s ego, perhaps ours, is enormously bloated and stands out.
He loves himself very much and is superior to everything else.
There are currently several articles blaming technologies, or rather the abuse we make of them as direct narcissist manufacturers, but were there no narcissists before the internet?
The cult to the ego.
The cult of ourselves, the body or the spirit according to time, existed long ago.
Let’s start with the narcissistic word itself that comes from the myth of Narcissus, which occurs in both Greek and Roman mythology.
It speaks of a handsome young man who has stolen the heart of every woman and who, for anger who should not drown in the water because he was in love with his reflection.
The problem has therefore existed since ancient times. What has changed are the elements of the game.
He has given us “selfies”, received a lot of “likes”, many photos and many friends, followers …
Even those who write on this website do not enjoy the proportion of times our article is shared?
Probably everyone, somehow or other, sometimes sins that the ego is ready.
However, it is easier to see the straw in someone else’s eye.
In fact, the only thing we can blame the internet is that it has made it simpler and more universal.
Now I can have many friends without having to work or look after those relationships, like a “like” from time to time.
I can teach others, my hundreds of “friends”, how happy I am with my life, my partner, my work, how handsome I am towards the natural (with mobile applications that correct, enlarge, lower and cover you of course). In short, it’s easy because I choose what I want to show.
The reality is that we live in a hectic era of capitalism and liberal economy, where we confuse happiness with consumerism, and this consumes us.
Nevertheless, it was possible to cross the line from self-esteem to self-centredness and narcissism before any social network. If not, ask Donald Trump.
That is an excellent example of what it is like to love yourself too much.
The neural circuits of egocentrism.
Internally, these little moments of pseudo-happiness that give us too much worship and make it known on the networks activate the brain reward centre as well as sex, food, generosity …
And finally, what gives meaning to our existence, what moves us and motivates us from the most biological and fundamental point of view is reward and pleasure.
How we achieve it will continue to vary: it is now fashionable to pose in photos and put a filter on my pasta dish, but perhaps hopefully tomorrow we will try altruism and generosity as a mechanism of cerebral reward.
We have to take care of the ‘child’ that we carry inside, but that does not mean that it is filled with candy.
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As always, thank you very much for being a beautiful soul!
Annemie Persyn Declercq.
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