The Jackass Narcissist.
The narcissist will unload all the blame for the demise of the relationship on you. They do this on their way out the door. Along with every shitty quality they possess, they will extract and take with them your high qualities. We have put together the narcissist infogram to make you conscious of narcissism.
Narcissism leaves you with a horrible sense of yourself. You think they are off to live happily ever after with someone else.
Not happening, anything without solid roots won’t last forever.
As you heal, you will begin to see that your mirage of Prince charming is a real life jackass. They have shit on you for too long. You will use their shit to grow back the excellent qualities you’ve always had deeply rooted in your soul.
They will always be a jackass!
Narcissistic Traits.
Nothing will ever be his fault.
He’ll never be there for you. Ever. No matter what.
He will always be the sad victim.
He will never see you, your need, your love, your pain, your loneliness, your accomplishments; Everything will be about him.
His way or the highway.
He’ll never, ever admit being wrong and evil.
He’ll be angry with you every single day.
Silent treatments and neglect can and do go on for several weeks at a time, especially if you point out one of his flaws.
When you finally leave, he’ll invent stories about you.
While you do everything possible to your relationship; he’ll do nothing.
You’ll start to feel like you are a 100 years old.
What happens when you stop being a source of supply for your Narcissist?
Once you have stopped being a source of supply for your Narcissist, he will discard you cruelly. He will do so callously and without a thought.
Before you are discarded, though, there is always another to take your place.
Your experience with a Narcissist has likely left you confused and devastated. While you are pining away for his return, know that he is not pining for you.
Because he lacks empathy, he cannot comprehend what you are feeling, and he is entirely self-absorbed.
The grandiosity of the false self makes the Narcissist believe they are desired. They wonder, if I’m such a bad guy, how do all these girls come to want me?
What he is incapable of seeing is that anyone can gain someone else’s trust and esteem through, lies and manipulation.
Real love and intimacy are created slowly over time and nurtured by consistent action, empathy, reciprocity, love, and respect.
For the narcissist his relationships are one-sided.
He only sees and values his wants and needs. He believes his partners exist only to provide him with supply. This mentality makes it pathological.
Narcissist Unmasked.
Sweetheart, stop beating yourself up.
The truth is, you are a fabulous person.
A diamond in a sea of rocks.
That asshole you thought you had a future with?
Well, that’s never going to happen because he is hopelessly broken in side somewhere.
The damage to his soul is never going to mend.
There is no room for improvement.
The only thing you can do now is to recognize that you danced with the devil. Given a chance, the evil would eradicate you.
You mean nothing to him now.
As lonely as it may seem, it’s time to address the issues left behind. Reflect on yourself and take care of your well-being!
Unlike him, you can fix what’s going on within you.
The Silence treatment of the narcissists.
Narcissists give the silent treatment because they are cowardly bullies. They cannot take responsibility for their actions. This prevents them from solving problems with others. They know how to use every little thing in their victims. However, their game is over the minute a victim points at them.
They want to do all the talking and criticizing, but never listen. Silence shows their contempt, hatred, and desire for revenge. It carries out their toxic and abusive behavior. Silence also exercises their control over the victim to feel more powerful.
Narcissists are emotional vampires.
A narcissist’s weapon of choice is often verbal. It includes slander lies and playing the victim in flipped tales. These tales confuse who was the victim and who was the abuser. It also involves gossip, rage, and verbal abuse. Additionally, intentional infliction of emotional pain is used.
It is a systematic dismantling of another person’s relationships, reputation, emotional, physical and spiritual health, life and very soul.
This experience is why narcissists are so regularly called emotional vampires.
Types of helpers of Narcissists.
Toxic people manipulate two kinds of helpers to do their dirty work against a victim
1 innocent individuals who don’t see the abuse
2 people who purposefully ignore the abuse
Aggression is one of three general patterns of abusive behavior.
Aggressive forms of abuse include name-calling, accusing, blaming, threatening, and ordering.
Aggressive behaviors are direct and obvious.
The one-up position the abuser assumes attempts to judge or invalidate the recipient. This undermines the equality and autonomy essential to healthy adult relationships.
This parent-to-child pattern of communication is common to all forms of verbal abuse. It is most obvious when the abuser takes an aggressive stance.
Aggressive abuse can also take a more indirect form and may even be disguised as “helping.”
Criticizing, advising, offering solutions, analyzing, probing, and questioning another person may be a sincere attempt to help.
In some instances, however, these behaviors may be an attempt to belittle, control, or demean rather than help.
The underlying judgmental “I know best” tone the abuser takes in these situations is inappropriate. It creates unequal footing in peer relationships.
Extreme narcissist.
Narcissism, in lay terms, basically means that a person is absorbed in self.
The extreme narcissist is the center of his universe.
To an extreme narcissist, people are things to be used.
It usually starts with a significant emotional wound or a series of them culminating in a major trauma of separation/attachment.
No matter how socially skilled an extreme narcissist is, he has a major attachment dysfunction.
The extreme narcissist is frozen in childhood.
He became emotionally stuck during his major trauma of separation/attachment.
Is he mad at me? That monster behind the mask.
When all is said and done with a narcissist, you’ll be surprised to find that he’s mad at you.
Yep, that’s right.
He doesn’t feel that you’re entitled to be upset about their abuse, lies, cheating, conning, and criticism.
However, they do feel entitled to be upset at you for detecting those things.
Where ordinary people feel remorse and embarrassment for their hurtful behavior, narcissist just shift the blame onto their victims.
It makes absolutely zero sense to a healthy human being.
You could have been the kindest, most forgiving person in the world.
It doesn’t matter.
The moment you stand up for yourself, they’ll smear your name and become an entirely unrecognizable person.
Frighteningly enough, that’s the person they are.
The monster behind the mask.
Everything else – the charm, the innocence, the naivety, the flattery – it’s all made up.
The narcissistic projection.
Projection can go both ways.
Our partners are berating us for whatever crime they think we have committed. Meanwhile, we are busy making excuses for them. We try to see it from their point of view. We sympathize with their pain and empathize. We always tiptoe through eggshells. We devise ways to go around their sensitive areas.
The narcissistic purpose to create a love relationship.
His goal creating a love relationship is for two reasons.
Firstly to secure narcissistic supply (attention), and
Secondly to have an outlet to project his internal pain and torture onto.
Relationship partners who are hooked and hang on make the perfect subjects to abuse
Victimized Narcissists.
Covert narcissistic abuse
Perhaps, of all types of narcissistic abusers, the victimized abuser is the most difficult to get past.
Some narcissists learned that they could get attention and control others by being victims.
Their lives become one sad story after another, and they find listeners and believers and helpers to manipulate.
This can be a type of covert narcissism that is very difficult to understand and handle.
Victimized narcissists are masters at projection, among other behaviors.
The narcissist can say any hurtful thing to you. But if you dare to say something back, you are labeled as abusive.
They can call you any name, but if you challenge them, you are mean.
The narcissist can lie about themselves and you, and they sound so honest.
And there will almost always be someone who will believe them.
Increase your knowledge about the narcissist.
A narcissist is a person without a conscience.
If you are in a relationship with a diagnosed narcissist, you may wonder how you ever got taken in by his charm. Or you might suspect someone may be one.
It is not your fault: narcissists are masters of persuasion and deception.
Leaving one or fighting back can be emotionally and physically dangerous.
The more you know about the characteristics of a narcissist, the better equipped you are to protect yourself.
Ex Recycling of the narcissist.
Psychopaths keep their exes strung along for added attention and triangulation.
They use these people to appear in “high demand” at all times, creating competition and jealousy with their current partners.
Their exes can usually be placed into one of two categories
1 In love with me
2 Crazy
The crazy exes saw through the narcissist lies. They refused to take part in their games anymore.
The “in love with me” exes are the ones who believe they play a unique role in the narcissist’s life. They still think they are important.
When the narcissist runs out of new victims, they will recycle these old targets. They will convince the world that they were soul mates all along.
The only pleased people are the crazy ones. They finally turned their backs and left all the manufactured drama behind.
The confused listener of a narcissist.
Lying, deceiving and manipulating are natural talents for narcissists.
When caught in a lie or challenged with the truth, they are seldom perplexed or embarrassed.
They simply change their stories or try to rework the facts, so they are consistent with their lies.
The result is a series of contradictory statements and a thoroughly confused listener.
The narcissistic Stare.
That has been experienced by many of us who have had the misfortune to associating with narcissists.
Not every narcissist does the stare, but from all reports, a significant majority of does.
The narcissist’s stare is piercing, unwavering, reptilian.
Seemingly flattering, this stare is unnerving – and is meant to be unnerving.
The narcissists are staring at you to see how vulnerable you are.
Some believe that the narcissist uses their stare to look through you. They peer into your soul. Their sole purpose is to determine whether you are suitable prey or not.
How to move on after a narcissist?
You need to change your mindset first. This is essential any time you seriously want to make a change. Then raise your standards.
Know that the pain will last for a while.
But constantly ask yourself, “Wait, is this person even worth my tears and heartache? Hell no.
The most important thing is to change what you demand of yourself. This is what I tell them when people ask me how to move on and let go. You also need to change your mindset. That pain is consuming you and clouding your judgment.
Think! I know that it hurts that you don’t have them. Never forget how much it hurt when you did have them.
Nine times out of 10, all they deserve from you is forgiveness and front-row seats to your recovery, without them.
Ghosting by the narcissist.
The term ghosting refers to the behavior of someone suddenly disappearing from a relationship with no warning or communication.
They just disappear for good.
This is a favorite tactic of many narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths.
They see this behavior as the ultimate sign of power.
In reality, it puts a bright spotlight on the erratic and dysfunctional behaviors that they love to deny exist.
Ghosting can lead survivors to truly see the toxic person for what they are: an abuser.
Narcissistic sociopath.
A narcissistic sociopath is someone with a combination of narcissistic personality disorder and definitive behavioral signs of sociopathy.
People with narcissism are characterized by their excessive and persistent need for others’ admiration and positive reinforcement.
They generally have grandiose opinions of themselves and believe they are superior to other people.
Narcissists often believe they are above the normal responsibilities and obligations of everyday life. As a result, they usually have significant difficulties maintaining employment or relationships.
The narcissistic sociopath has this type of personality. They show a noticeable lack of regard for the rights of others. They also have a tendency to regularly violate those rights.
The narcissistic personality disorder facts.
The narcissist infogram 1
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